And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. Hebrews 10:24-25
I honestly can say that I'm not a smart cookie. My hubby (who is smart cookie) can read something,learn it right away and teach it back to others. For me, it takes repetition and constant cycling to process the information just to have it soak in for myself! And often times, I forget. For instance,just tonight when I was showering I couldn't remember whether or not I had shampoo'ed my hair-so I think I ended up doing it twice. There's a mommy brain for you.
When it comes to our children, we want what's "best" for them because we love them right? So what does that really mean- What is best for them? and how do we show love to them? Before having kids I had a different perspective of what it meant to be a "good parent" - giving them a ton of praise, showing love and affection with encouragement and lots of kisses and hugs, use positive reinforcement and very little negative words, etc. All those are definitely good things but if you don't have the central message to hold it's ground - every good intention you have can lead to a dangerously created self destructive, self-centered being.
Last night Hubby and I had the opportunity to hear Dr. Tedd Tripp, author of Shepherding a Child's Heart , provide wisdom and insight to biblical parenting. Some friends couldn't make it so I thought I would share the notes I took. There wasn't a formal outline provided so it's just what I wrote. Hopefully it's clear and easy to understand!
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What is a Family? A Night of Wisdom with Dr. Tedd Tripp
1.) The Family/Home is a Theological Learning Community (to Learn about God)
The interpretation of life comes from family and creates a perspective. So it's important to set the right tone for children. Children are wired to worship. Children will either worship God or idols. They are subtle idols of the heart.
- Teach children the worthiness of God - Psalm 145:4
- Show them the wonders of God
- Dazzle your kids with the power of God - God should be on display all the time as a glorious and magnificent God.
- Children see the world through a lens, which lens are your children looking through? Do they see a high view of God?
Ex: The sun is in the center of all the planets. The planets circulate around the sun being that is the core of their existence. So God, like the sun, needs to be in the center of our lives, the main weight and mass that holds everything together (i.e. school, marriage, relationships, career, friendships)
References: Daniel 3- He does Hill will; Malachi 3:6- "I the Lord do not change"; Ephesians 2, Romans 15:5; Psalm 62
2.) The Family/Home is a Sociological Learning Center (Loving Neighbors)
- Children are social beings, there will be social conflicts everyone. Examples include- slandering one another, fighting, greed, envy)
- James 4: Quarrels come from yourself, not people outside and what they do to you. You are to look inside at the wars within.
- Even as parents, we have desires waging war inside ourselves (i.e wanting kids to respond a certain way because it's your will that you want to be done).
- Children can learn the ugliness of self love if you show them where love comes from and what it is.
- Own Desires vs. Christ Desires
3.) The Family/Home is a Redemptive Community Learning Place (To keep the Gospel central)
- Develop structure in the home where the Gospel is in the center. The core of the problem is themselves. They are in need of Christ and the grace of God.
- Ex: "Just be nice" attitude removes the need for grace and the Gospel. love others like you love yourself
- Explain that you can't love others from the heart because you can't do things on your own. But Christ came to the world to free us from the compulsive self love. There is hope for us. Jesus came into the world as flesh, experienced the world as a human, but sinless, to redeem us as a perfect sacrifice.
- SIN ISSUE: Self centeredness, pride, selfish, own will
- Stand in solidarity with your child, talk eye to eye and talk about sin issues - not just the behavioral issues
- Titus 3: Grace motivates righteous behavior
- Embrace living under redemptive grace of God, which motivates to do good by the grace of God
- Your weakness won't keep you from God, but your strengths will.
There were 2 books recommended:
I bought the Shepherding a Child's Heart when KA was only 6 months so I have some re-reading and catching up to do! And for the Child Training Tips book, I just bought that at our church bookstore for $8. Again, I am no avid reader so getting on these books will need some encouragement for myself! I found some online worksheets to provide an outline for me to follow, divided into sections of bible verse memory, passage review and application questions.
Just printed these babies out so they are hot off the press and ready for me to dig into! Hopefully you'll be encouraged to purchase these books if you haven't already and dig into what it means to have the right parenting - Biblical parenting.
Session 1 : Getting to the Heart of the Behavior (Just Chapter 1)
Shepherding a Child's Heart: Chapter by Chapter Questions (Chapters 1-15)
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